end of a mop.I WAS FREE. my legs seemed ready to comply.

This attacker was a bear of a man with massive arms nearly twice the size of mine
This attacker was a bear of a man with massive arms nearly twice the size of mine. or where. Give me your hand. landing on what would have been his face. other visitors came through our town. praised for valor in battle. It may be cold.Professor . and to my horror spotted two large Turks preparing to tip a vat of bubbling tar upon those manning the ram. women.Hold your tears. All I could do was scream.Infidels unlucky enough not to be killed on the field of battle were handed to them like scraps to a dog.Slowly. and smiled too.What has happened here? a soldier muttered. it looks old.I called her my princess. Now he was gone and I was here. Laughter that had somehow touched the Turk. you must kill me in the name of what we donot embrace. A sea of body parts.

taunting and mocking us. When they were done. insisted that the scouts and maps suggested a point to the south. This madness just wouldn't stop!On the steps of the altar. I didn't remember my father.Now I was free.. Tafur. Clad in colorful. They raised me as one of their own. I am sure. I went on. One by one. Norcross jeered. Make way!We scattered off the trail and turned to see Guillaume.Press on. Father Leo. I squinted through the trees and felt my jaw drop.There was a ground-shaking rumble from the west.Carrot-top here must be keen on the miller. catcalls. gone.

Then.Nicodemus started to answer. I swear it. I did not care about Antioch.I have to go. searching for archers or pitch.. Now that was just a mocking refrain in my dreams. our liege lord. Or freeing Jerusalem. her brave smile as I hopped down the road. He leaped from his horse and thrashed around for Guillaume under the surface. It was impossible to tell a red cross from a pool of blood. `Very well. this one bare chested and monstrous. But it seemed strong.Georges threw himself at the chatelain's feet. God will watch over me. lay in the column's path. Sophie said with a start. Mother of God..

Hugh? Nicodemus called out as we made our way along a particularly treacherous incline. Just like when we were children.A dark-skinned Saracen whirred by. I stayed.What's going on? Robert looked around. Even my mother's mother could cross here. sweltering in our tunics and armor. stay by me..But look.Good Lord . hooded eyes that flashed only a sliver of light.Be brave .I searched my mind for something to say in his tongue. On the fate of your soul.Guillaume's horse waded in. daylight darkened. a heralded fighter. And Jean the smith. A good-sized river. I pumped out my chest. the town's priest.

an arrow piercing his throat so completely his hands gripped it on both sides.My throat went dry.He carried Alo. Free of my illusions. gaining hold. who demands your service.Everyone in town stood and stared. what do you see?What do I see? Either the holiest army I've ever seen or the dumbest. Maybe the language of the Jews.. Just like when we were children. `Now. Jagged mountains appeared in our path. European. drop to his knees.Are there any believers here ?He was pale and long nosed. seeming to split him in two. I reached for Robert and pulled the boy toward the mountain's face. then slowly raised the wheel. Whatever I thought I was fighting for. to ask God for the forgiveness of my sins. It seemed as if our whole army was being slaughtered.

. Word has reached him that a rabble passed through here a day ago. We're going in.. I came bearing a sunflower. The detachment at Xerigordon had already been done in-not by siege butthirst. Its frightened eyes showed that the animal was aware of the danger. Behind me. We split up our forces.What has happened here? a soldier muttered. That brave smile..As we fled. It would have beenme in that pool of blood that was leaking across the stones. Narrow passes. mock waving. Tafur.The nobles pushed us hard. but I stayed behind.Robert ran ahead to hurl one of the rocks toward the walls. we grew to hate and curse.Never mind.

I wished Nico were here. In all this madness I had found a moment of clarity and truth with this Turk. And so wasour song:A maiden met a wandering man / In the light of the moon's pure cheer. I squawked about like a chicken. Begging to God. Let him up. The talk. the lower our spirits fell. but it didn't take a seer to divine that he was lying.But the old Greek was too slow and laden with gear to get out of the way. Th-the thing is. I waited for the death blow.I was heading home to Sophie. redhead. but these savages would surely kill me. We were meant to be together. not some trumped-up duke or king in crested mail and armor sitting imperiously atop a massive charger. she said.First it was the heat.The longer Antioch survived.. All I could think to utter was.

almost dumbfounded.Everyone in town stood and stared. do you not?Norcross leaned against the wheel for the longest time. I instructed him. Then I saw his expression relax into the slightest inkling of a smile. another survivor recounted. the small group of men Robert and I had attached ourselves to began to thin. bearing the knight in full chain mail. while the fearful cleric did his best to defend himself with a rough wooden staff. You must let go. still eyes. To study the metal trade.. red-eyed demon that. sucking in precious food..Was this possible? Was it possible that in the midst of this carnage I had found a soul kindred to my own? I looked into his eyes: this beast that only a moment before was set to chop me in two.Be brave .. And the vermin had told me I was free. Several other people. and outlaws hoisting their sacks and makeshift weapons.

their skin blistered from the touch of the metal. which was starting to fill up.Please. tearing at their sizzling faces and eyes.. We're going in. Let him up. To see Sophie once more. Jean the smith. No reason to make one less. because I have not given you a child.She moved with me in perfect rhythm. Hundreds of men were gathered there. I heard the sound of bones cracking. Seeing his comrades slain. knowing that on the other side lay Antioch. the Spaniard Mouse remarked. Guillaume turned around and waved. Then he merely winked at me. their towns now under Christian flags. You must let go. Infidels.

the Tafur had said.. No great loss. Are you ready.No one wants to hear your silly jokes. limbs cut off and piled like wood. inside the mill. I reached for the priest's wooden staff. Except me. I'll need it more when I come back. Then turbaned horsemen charged-wave after wave. For what end?Why did you spare me? I looked into the Turk's dull. and even more than that.. kneel and take the Cross. the truth seemed so clear. A good-sized river. barely able to believe my eyes. It was impossible to tell if they were Christian or Turk.. It took my breath away.All around me.

When he was on the ground. we quietly crept back within sight of the city walls. miller. the stubborn Bohemond among them. The Turk let out a chilling howl. we continued along the ridge and down the narrow trail. some old knights parading in rusty armor.Father.Then Antoine.. but so was I. we joined forces with Count Robert of Flanders and Bohemond of Antioch. We're too few as it is.Suddenly I heard a rumble from above. men and women; some carrying axes and mallets and old swords.If this is the Holy Land. I heard voices. . thin as a pole. Amid all this fighting.The longer the horrible siege went on.The old man looked up at me and shook his head.

I love you too. and Nicodemus trying to settle it. Our division captain ordered us to follow.Such a city I had never seen before in all my life.The lead vermin ran the blade of his sword across my chest. The peril of the climb was broken by a few welcome laughs. I simply could not hold back. Robert among them. The lucky among us were slain where they stood. there was no option but to stand and fight.. but so was I. knocking him off his post and flush against the wall just as a sulfurous black wave engulfed his ram-mates. I fell to the ground happy just to be alive..Was this possible? Was it possible that in the midst of this carnage I had found a soul kindred to my own? I looked into his eyes: this beast that only a moment before was set to chop me in two.. This madness just wouldn't stop!On the steps of the altar. An image of my own death rose in my mind. Her tinkling little-girl laugh. A calm came over me. Others.

a diminutive Spaniard with a large hooked nose.I missed being free.Then I knelt beside Robert. I saw something there that this whole bloody night I had not seen: virtue.Sophie turned in my arms and faced me with a blank.Mocking us was more like it. A sliver of orange light was just breaking over the hills to the east.Then I knelt beside Robert.The giant man hesitated. She would never know how I died.. All I could think to utter was. Jean the smith. who instructs him. I could not hold it back.I came upon a Christian church. It had been my home for the past three years. from burying the dead. men and women; some carrying axes and mallets and old swords.Send Hortense after them. Only last week did you not have two sons?My son Matt has gone to Vaucluse. their skin blistered from the touch of the metal.

Isn't that right. a memento. I knew. which fell all the way down her back.Constantinople. Jeers.. Guillaume. These savages had chopped to pieces the last shred of humanity for me in all this hell. Or freeing Jerusalem. The rest of us set out for there.At last the abbess stops at a door. I heard the sound of bones cracking. To tell her I loved her. stuffing anything of value into their filthy robes. I no longer knew what was inside of me. start with this.The Turk took a measuring look at me. you won't have your treasure for long. quickening peals-echoing through town in the middle of the day. We'll throw in two bushels of carrots!I was about to go on-a joke. endured so much-God's call resounding in their hearts-were cut down like grain in a field.

clattering to the ground. like an eighth-moon. But in truth. sweltering in our tunics and armor.I wanted to take something from the church with me. A traveler is walking down a quiet road when he notices a sign scratched onto a tree: `Sisters of St. `Please. which dipped deep beneath the surface of the river. sorry voice. I took another step. their long. his eyes like fiery coals.now .Please . boy. passing from horror to horror.A massive walled fortress. eh. And I. one step at a time. Robert shouted. We were lying as one on the straw mattress in our small quarters behind the inn.

Without my noticing it at first. New aromas entranced me. I did not. in hues of crimson and purple I had never seen. There was nothing more to say. like nothing I had ever seen before. pieces of shit.Such a city I had never seen before in all my life. not a noble anywhere.St.He peered over the edge and swallowed.You probably thought you were ridding the world of a complete madman.. And you too. I felt sure I would soon die too. he seemed to grow. in hues of crimson and purple I had never seen.Frantic shouts rang out.The arid lands of our Lord's great sacrifice have been defiled by the infidel Turk.. he shouted to Raymond. Larger and more formidable than any castle I had ever seen back home.

Too late. just as one of the attackers thrust a dagger into the belly of the priest. I reached for the priest's wooden staff.I pressed Robert up against the wall. echoed everywhere. All the toasts had been made and farewells said.She nodded.I will come! I will take the Cross. a vassal of Bohemond.From out of the trees. choking Alo go under one more time.I won't. Then our dispirited army headed farther south. fell away from me.Under the shield of darkness.As it did. We know.Every couple of days. so lacking in all provision. I had hesitated. spoils. a thin band of beech wood painted with flowers.

As Norcross passed the miller's cowering daughter. Roman ruins and temples. his rush was intercepted by Robert. I could see in Sophie's eyes that she felt it too. I fixed on a face above the main gate. or close my eyes. galloped down the line on their crested mounts. raiders. one nonbeliever to another. her yellow hair pinned up for the workday under a white cap. And higher up. The pious among us dreamed of their holy mission; the nobles.Why don't we see what his protection is truly worth. until his powerful body resembled some hideous slab of meat and not the noble soul he was.He grinned sheepishly. Ten of Paris could have fit within its walls. my son?'`I saw your signs along the road. Anything might happen. The traveler goes in and is greeted by another comely nun. Feel free to help yourselves to some of the miller's lovely grain. his goose comically trailing behind. What remains of it.

thinking of how I would describe it all to Sophie. yelping mad cries that I recognized asAllahu Akbar. Or freeing Jerusalem. he seemed to grow. resolved that any breath might be my last. It seemed to stretch out forever.TWO DAYS LATER. I knew. I had to do something-even if it sealed my own fate.I've heard from the Spaniard there are Christians chained to the city's walls.I'll find food. they run like grandmothers. lightweight cottons and silks. Blood and gore soaked the ground everywhere. `Please. who farmed a plot by the river. Behind me. For a few moments. Freedom. I urged the Turk.I know that is a pile of shit. The smallest hope flashed through me: maybe I could whack it across his ankles.

I came upon a Christian church.. to ask God for the forgiveness of my sins.For those who come..Norcross strutted around the square. Hortense disappeared. I thought I saw something there that in that instant mirrored my own thoughts.Everyone be ready. from burying the dead. The singing stopped. the trail ahead was lined with large white rocks.Robert ran ahead to hurl one of the rocks toward the walls.She had nearly drifted off to sleep.. I raised myself to my elbows. then head directly for it. But the forays were met with such fierce resistance from the walls that they became graveyards for our bravest men. Thousands of them. was of treasure and glory. I saw that Civetot was smoking like burning cinders. trying to catch hold on the trail.

spinning around a final time to catch her laugh. Hugh. Water was as scarce as wine. The conquering throng had gone deeper into Antioch.. barely able to believe my eyes. running from house to house. hurrying from the well with her bucket.There was a shriek.Then Norcross's face split into an amused smile. I had sworn in my heart to protect him. you will think this was Paradise. my son. his white hair and beard billowing in the draft. Who knows what I might find there? There are tales of riches just for the taking. Fresh-faced and chattering. Every house in the village had been burned or sacked. It carries your food for the next two weeks. another tax levied upon us. The Turk fell to his knees.I gave a last wave to Sophie. I was sure.

I held her by the waist and she moved on top of me. A peddler with a cart was considered an event here.FOR DAYS TO COME. softly moaning with pleasure and love. Even us. Along the way. How could anyone but a devil have such bright red hair? she said. literally roasting in their armor. People will be eager to feed a Crusader. will you? In a flash. choking Alo go under one more time.. This time. torsos naked and disemboweled. I lost my tongue.I struggled to my feet. slaughtering infidels and hoarding all the spoils.The sun became a raging.A cabbage. or the only Turkish blood you'll see will be at the end of a mop.I WAS FREE. my legs seemed ready to comply.